Frustration

I could not hide
My past
Could I?
Could I be happy
As she was...
My lipstick
Does not make me fine
My smile
Hides
Or may be gone.
I feel
I could not
Open door
But no return
To past is must
I try rentlessly
To go...
But where
How...
Without smile?...
I lost so long ago
In past
Or may be never had
I do not know
How to find
And searching
Till the end ...